An Eclipse and a Regret

Today I saw the most spectacular sight I’ve ever seen.

My wife and I took our kids to watch the “great 2017 American solar eclipse.” We were fortunate to be in the path of totality. The timing was perfect, and so was our placement; just between all the clouds.

We had fun watching the moon slip completely in front of the sun with our NASA-approved shades, however out of an abundance of caution we only allowed the kids to look at the corona for a few brief seconds. I later saw/learned that the precious minutes when the sun was completely covered were safe for viewing with the naked eye.

I regret not allowing the kids to spend more time looking at the corona. I regret not spending more viewing time myself. I regret the time and trauma I’ve caused my family during my years of insobriety. There are hurts I caused to precious hearts that can never be undone. But how grateful I am to find recovery while my kids are still young. How grateful for the hurts that never were.

I believe the path I’m on is leading to more trust to a point where I can let go of my control issues, like those leading to today’s regret, and live life to the fullest.

I also believe in a merciful God who will heal the wounded hearts of my wife and children.

So while I continue piling up regrets, I believe their numbers are dropping, and they are slowly being eclipsed by the hope of life touched by grace.

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